Leaving Albert

I gave him his One Last Night, the bastard.

I'd promised, and I'm a woman of my word.

I avoided him all evening. I could hear his Gollum-like wheedling from the dusty corner where I'd flung him that morning. Finally, hours later than I'd promised, I pinned up my Saddam Hussein tresses, closed my eyes and bared my neck.

Albert's grimy hands closed around it for the last time. Fuck you, Albert, I muttered, popping a Valium. I'm gonna spend our last night together in oblivion.

And at seven thirty this morning I pried his sticky fingers from my neck for the last time. His outraged cry was hoarse and rough as velcro ripped right next to the ear.

See you in Hell, Albert.